Text 12 Apr

I saw a t-shirt that said, “I’m fucking stupid.”


Talk about open to interpretation …

Text 12 Apr

“This time, it looks like you sucked off more than you can swallow.”

Text 12 Apr

I did it – I’m guilty.


1000 lashes with a wet … poodle.

Text 12 Apr

“Baby, I have the key to your lock.”


“It’s a retina scan.”


“That’s okay – I don’t mind looking in it first.”

Text 12 Apr

Pussies afraid of water?


Not after they come swimming.

Text 12 Apr 1 note

“Big Dong is making some noise tonight.”


Doesn’t everyone name their grandfather clock?

Photo 12 Apr 653,272 notes
via DORFED.
Video 12 Apr 16,574 notes
Photo 11 Apr 18 notes moarrrmagazine:

welcome to my crib

moarrrmagazine:

welcome to my crib

via MOARRR.
Text 11 Apr

“Wear your panties?


I’ll wear them right out, if you want me to.”


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